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I’ve been rather quiet on the blog-front for the past couple of months.
It’s hard to believe it has actually been a month since I last posted anything.
There are thoughts
that have been … f l o o d i n g … my mind and my heart,
leaving me uncertain what to say, what to share, how to present
the ambivalence and the toddling steps of my own growth.

On the education front,
I have now progressed through the
“Dan Allender” classes… and their associated papers…
Faith, Hope, and Love … The Personal Tragedy Paper
Marriage and Family … The Family of Origin Paper
Sexual Disorders … The Sexual Development Paper
all designed to invite us to venture further into our stories
into the myriad of happenings and experiences that have
influenced and sculpted
the stuff we are made of
all that makes us unique and quirky and vulnerable and closed off.
The exploration has been difficult …
like moving through quicksand
that has been laced with time-bombs
and amazing delicacies that startle the senses.

And, at the same time,
my spirit has been stirred with vision and purpose
dare I even say it…
with HOPE
as the Spirit has continued to reveal sought after depths of wisdom,
defining His calling, His message, the good works He has prepared
for me to do –
just because I am called according to His purposes
in Christ Jesus!

And wouldn’t you just know it….
it seems to be
that the wrestling I am doing in “school
and the heart of the message that He is opening my eyes to see and know
are              on           collision
surely              a                    cOurSe.

A heart that is wrecked
but wrecked for good
shattered and broken
like BREAD
and a life that is trampled
crushed under foot and ready to be poured out
at the foot of the Cross
WINE for the weary and downtrodden
an offering of praise and worship
and the sheer JoY of obedience and surrender

I am found
and still waiting
with eyes wide open
to SEE
what wonders HE will accomplish
as ALL my worlds collide

I am expectant
and yet
filled with the
Breath        of        Life 

I am blessed, beloved, beholding!

I am the daughter of His amazing grace.