Rain. Water on the road…
I woke to the witness of it as cars drove by on the street just below my barely cracked window.
The veiled first light of dawn invited me into my waking dream out of my slumber… “Begin your day in this freshness ~ the newness of this day!”
I want to wake up ~ to really pour myself into new rhythms, pursue my passions with ALL of me present, and yet ~ I find myself so distracted by the cares of this world.
I am surrounded by chaos ~ topsy-turvy stuff – mine, my son’s, family stuff ~ we’ve been moving, placing, rearranging ~ a constant play like the old thumb puzzles ~ all evidence of the limbo that is my now. A new “boy” moving into the “Honey House” (the previous owner of our home had bees all over the county and harvested and sold the honey – from this particular outbuilding, which has served many purposes over our years here) ~ displacing my oldest son before I am out of my room and on to new adventures. So, some of what I won’t be taking with me has been moved out to their new spaces and some put in storage waiting for me to get settled elsewhere, some has been simply been moved to make room so some of my son’s things can be moved in while he sleeps in the “office” cubby downstairs.
Stuff is everywhere!!! And I am having to deal with the reality of young men in what was once my home who I did not raise and train to live thinking about the presence of others and how to clean up after themselves and pay attention to their surroundings ~ my patience wears thin. However, I am choosing to not get drawn into mothering the wounded little boy in a man’s body struggling to learn what it means to become his own separate self and receive healing and redemption ~ struggling in his not yet ready state. I realize my need to pray and release and invite Holy Spirit ~ softener of hearts, minds, bodies ~ come! This is Her work!
And with the releasing prayer, I look out
my this dining room window and smile at the dogwood blooms dancing in the breeze. Oh, the stories ~ the movies ~ running in my mind… my children playing, building snow forts, digging giant holes to move the lilacs from this spot to the front and this dogwood from its old spot to this one. I was told by the “experts” it couldn’t be done. And against all odds ~ she majestically chooses to flourish! A little trimming and pruning is needed this year, but she is covered in beautiful, creamy white crosses slowly opening their faces ~ gracing my heart with beautiful memories of life and favor and strength and tenacity!
I, too, am covered with blooms and fruit yet to be borne ~ and with a little expert pruning from my Master Gardener ~ more than just surviving… I flourish!
Dayenu! It is enough!